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The Best Lines from Dive Bar Yelp Reviews

Eater pulled out the best lines from Austin’s dive bar reviews on Yelp.

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Nadia Chaudhury is the editor of Eater Austin covering food and pop culture, as well as a photographer, writer, and frequent panel moderator and podcast guest.

The Best Lines from Dive Bar Yelp Reviews Best Lines from Dive Bar Yelp Reviews Reviewing Dive Bars Through Yelp Looking through the Yelp reviews Eater pulled out the best lines from Austin’s dive bar reviews on Yelp.

Dive bars are really the people’s bars, and this is so much truer in Austin than anywhere else. Sure, the city has a bustling fancypants cocktail scene, but for those seeking out the comforting respite of a good old dark watering hole, nothing fills the role better than a dive bar. Eater did a little digging through Yelp of the city’s best dive bars, pulling out the best lines from reviews, from the Christmas reappropriation at Lala’s Little Nugget, the honky-tonk vibe of Ginny’s Little Longhorn Saloon, and the circus show of Carousel Lounge.

Lala’s Little Nugget

Yelper Kazia L.:

"The truth is that I sort of hate Christmas. I wonder if that's part of the reason I love the concept of this bar so much. It's an absurd reappropriation of all the holiday iconography that we feel obligated to agree carry nostalgic or emotional weight."

Yelper Robin S.:

"Lala's is kitsch in the best sense of the word; it begs for a great indie movie filming. The producers wouldn't need to change a thing, they could just roll on in and film the drunken pool players beaning people sitting at the bar, the grumpy, sourpuss asian bartender, or the clothesline of santas that dance above the bar each time the men's room door opens."

Yelper Christine A.:

"If Santa Claus and Blanche of the Golden Girls had a baby girl, they would name her Lala."

Ginny's Little Longhorn Saloon

Yelper Deniz V.:

"This is the epitome of a dive bar experience. You've got people hanging out in lawn chairs in the parking lot partly because they won't fit inside, and partly because they just want to, you've got a tiny crowded bar that serves cheap no frills beers, you've got music from people you've never heard of, and you've got chicken shit bingo."

The White Horse

Yelper Amanda S.:

"What is there not to love here?! There is always some awesome bluegrass/country band playing = awesome! You want to dance? Go ahead they got that too! Oh you don't know how to dance? Well that is cool too, there are lots of people on the dance floor that don't know how to dance not giving a %$#&. Now if you do mind sweaty bodies, bearded hipsters ... well this might not be your spot."

Yelper Susan K.:

"This place is hard to explain! You just have to go and experience it for yourself! Its [sic] like, hipsters meet John Wayne in a back ally, and in a West Side Story style song and dance, they start to two step together! Its awesome!"

Yelper Samuel C.:

"I'm pretty sure the owners would be insulted at any rating higher than three stars. They're not here to blow you away with glitz and glamour, but they do what they do well."

Carousel Lounge

Yelper Sheila F.:

"Carousel Lounge is the ultimate dive bar! Walking in the door is more like entering portal to a WEIRD WEIRD alternate universe."

Yelper Sydney T.:

"I feel like an ad for this place would read: COME ONE, COME ALL TO THE WEIRDEST SHOW ON EARTH, ER...AUSTIN!"

Deep Eddy Cabaret

Yelper Aaron A.:

"A defiantly old-school outpost of dive-ness perched on the hill above Deep Eddy Pool, across Mopac from the rapid mutations of development downtown, Deep Eddy Cabaret is where you go when you don't want to deal with the changes that are sweeping over Austin."

Yelper Jens B.:

"For me Deep Eddy has been a decades old respite from the crowd. It get's [sic] discovered from time to time by folks, but then it is forgotten. For this I am happy."


Yelper Courtney W.:

"I've made many mistakes in my life, but patronizing this establishment has never been one of them. I've seen so many different faces here and we all share the same knowing look - this is a place to escape the harsh realities of the world waiting just outside the front door, even if only for a few hours."

Yelper Debby K.:

"Barfly's is beautiful and dangerous. It's a nice dive bar that draws all sorts of folks looking for cheap drinks and a dangerously high staircase (seriously though WATCH. OUT). I like Barf's cos I can call it Barf's and cos the bartenders are sweeties and cos I have never felt uncomfortable there, and I am uncomfortable most places."

Yelper Carly W.:

"I'm a huge fan of this place. Its [sic] low on the creeper factor and high on the cheap drink factor. Its a dive that's somehow classy. It has clean bathrooms and pool tables. What more can a girl want?"